Sdura quit with his beloved work what to do. How to survive dismissal? Tips of psychologists

WikiHow works on the principle of wiki, which means that many of our articles are written by several authors. When creating this article above its editing and improvement, including anonymous, 15 people (a) worked.

Your boss invites you to the office, closes the door and says: "... We are not satisfied with how you work in this post, so we decided to dismiss. Free the workplace and get a calculation in accounting." How to cope with this situation without dropping your dignity?

Steps

Give yourself a minute (or five) to come to yourself after shock and gather with thoughts. Take a breath. If you want to cry, please do not change the situation, but perhaps you will help you to overcome it better, splashing your emotions.

Perceive the situation correctly. Perhaps your first urge is to consider yourself a bad employee, a person and a loser in general, but this is just a voice panic. Instead, tell me: "I performed inappropriate for myself." This is important: the work is not to blame and you are not to blame, it is a combination of work and you did not work. So do not be ashamed of the situation. There are millions of reasons why work does not work, and none of them implies 100% of your guilt.

Do not try to change the decision. You can visit the temptation to ask you another chance, but you should resist him. The decision is made and almost always irrevocably. Molbi only weaken your ability to further negotiate.

Treat negotiations on the conditions of your dismissal. The employer does not want extra problems, in particular, to earn a bad reputation. So that's what you can negotiate:

• Agree on how the employer will respond, in the case of appealing to it for the recommendation. The safest version of his answer is: "Yes, he worked as an employee, but in our organization there is a policy of non-disclosure assessment."
• Ask generous compensation. Require the payment of holidays and hospitals, as well as such compensation on which, in your opinion, they can agree between the monthly and three-month salary. Perhaps you will not pay as much as you ask, but this is a good start of negotiations.
• Ask the employer to extend the action of the DMS for some period.
• Ask help in finding new work. Some employers offer employment firms. If not, ask which organizations you could recommend to find work. They may have information on vacancies.

1. Dire with self-esteem. Do not wait for the end of the working day - assemble things in the workplace and go. If you stop colleagues to say goodbye, thank them politely, but do not shake the walls with screams about the fact that you just happened. Never say anything bad either about the boss, nor about the company - burn all the bridges so that you are not haunted offense.

   Immediately report the happening family. Even if you are still experiencing shock and shame, tell your family about what happened and discuss how you can do everything with it. Despite the fact that your relatives also experience shocks and unpleasant feelings, in the long run you will easier begin to take further actions together.

   Give yourself a restoration time. You will have the temptation immediately start searching for a new job, but you need to give yourself time to experience what happened, get rid of shame and panic and begin to think clearly. Take a couple of weeks to spend it with your family and concentrate on further plans.

2. Realize that this is not the end of the path. Despite the fact that it is sometimes difficult, it is not necessary to think about that together with the dismissal from work you have ended with all life. Start considering the situation as a turning point on the way to change for the better. Of course, this is a difficult time, but it is it that can give you new opportunities.

   • Hold the time to figure out whether you want to stay in the same area of \u200b\u200bactivity or it is worth trying something else.
   • Perhaps in the first few days you will constantly call your friends and colleagues to find out how your business. Hold on to talk with everything in a row. Pass everything through one friend that you are fine and that you just took the time to a break, and then in the next few days, weeks or months - no matter - call back everything.
   • Make sure the dismissal is carried out in accordance with the terms of your employment contract and labor legislation, in general.
   • Be responsible. Returning home, cancel all purchases other than the most necessary and form a budget in accordance with those means that you have. Develop a financial plan. This will reduce the level of stress and keep you from getting enough for the first job.
   • Sometimes compensation for dismissal is given under certain conditions: you can not discuss the reasons for dismissal, you cannot discuss the terms of compensation, you cannot negatively respond about the company or its leadership, you cannot go to work towards competitors and so on. If you breed these conditions, compensation can be recovered with you back through the court.
   • Get official written Confirmation of the company's intentions.
   • As a rule, after message about dismissal, access to a personal computer closes. Accordingly, (since you read this article, you have not been fired) today, Come to work:
     • Send to your personal email address all personal information from the computer that you would like to keep after dismissal: personal mail, examples of workers Matelov, recipes for their colleagues - anything. Do not send it all from your working address, go to your personal mail and send from there.
     • Make copies of all the files you want to leave yourself (templates of documents, materials for work, contacts) and take home.

   Warnings

   • Resist the motivation to call colleagues and complain to the company and its leadership.
   • Come home, do not try to collect things and leave the city. Flight from problems only aggravates the situation, and besides, moving to another city without visible to the reasons - a red rag for employers. It is better to update your resume and place it on the respective sites.

According to passion, it is inferior to the divorce or death of a loved one. Especially when it comes to dismissal.

Experts advise: Try to leave with dignity, not offending others and without destroying yourself. From how you behave at this difficult time, your future life depends.

Will in fist!

There is a huge temptation to finally express all that you think about him. Or make some nastyness: hide the necessary data, carry out the phone numbers of important customers, for a while paralyzing the work of the once native firm.

Do not do that! First, the professional circle is very narrow, and when your new head will call the former, it is unlikely that he will find a couple of good words to your address. Secondly, if you want the Chef to truly regret your dismissal, you need to act in the opposite way.

Collect the will in the fist and on the last day warmly say goodbye to him, saying the kind words. Maybe he will not call you back (which, by the way, is not excluded), but for sure will give excellent characteristic. No matter what kind of relationships you had before this minute. As you know, the first and last words are remembered most.

Risk group

Loss of work often undermines human self-esteem. He has a feeling of resentment and the feeling of loss of control over life: "Why did you miss me?", "Did I really have the worst worker?", "I do not decide anything in this life." If such thoughts are visited, you need to say to yourself: "Stop! Life is not only work. In such a difficult situation, it is much more constructive to ask another question - why did the fate threw you such a test, what lessons can I remove from this?

Practice shows: most often the work lose people with two opposite psychological installations. First of all, these are those who are imperceptibly for themselves to live on inertia, who work has not been making no moral, nor material satisfaction. But it is not enough courage to put the appointment on the table by Bedolfi. And every morning goes to work as on the cautious. Here is the fate and throwing him an unexpected permission of the problem - in the form of a reduction in personnel or rotations leading to dismissal.

Oddly, risk of losing work and people with another installation - workaholics, which identify their lives with work, putting it in the first place in the scale of life values. Often, fate punishes such one-sidedness. In addition, too the registry officer often causes annoyance at the authorities: suddenly he will be professional than his leadership?

Vicious circle

Having lost its work, a person gets at his disposal a huge amount of free time. Perhaps at first it even pleases: finally it will be possible to rest! But relaxing truly, as a rule, it does not work. And the unemployed person begins to worked out suddenly the emptiness formed in his life. According to the observations of psychologists, such a situation is a nutrient medium for the appearance of neurosis.

A kind of vicious circle arises: due to the fact that there is no work, you are experiencing depression, and this, in turn, does not make it possible to find a job. If such a state lasts long enough, the case can reach not only before depression, but also to severe physical ailments. Such a "psychophysical wear" effect of psychiatrists often observe not only those who have lost their jobs, but also in those who have retired: an intensive man suddenly begins to grow rapidly, all sorts of sores begin to stick.

To do not bring themselves to this, experts advise: the search for a new place should be started on the same day when you were informed about the dismissal. The more time passes after losing the work, the more difficult it will be to find it. Take away to the dismissal as a strength test, as for the exam, passing which you will come to success.

The more actions, the stronger the return

And in order for the time "from work to work", do not destroy yourself, and at the same time relationship with friends and loved ones, try to work out a clear strategy:

● Keep the former rhythm and routine of life. Stop, breakfast, dinner and dinner at the same time as before. If you are a man, we certainly silence every morning. If you are a woman, happily and apply light makeup.

● Daily do something to search for work: view the websites on the Internet, send a summary, learn employment logs, go to interviews. The pattern is notified: if you called not at five today, and at ten firms, then tomorrow you will receive calls twice as much as in previous days.

● Use free time to do your health. Do not look late the TV, pour, do not drink coffee and strong tea, be sure to go out every day to the street. Visit the dentist, other doctors, go through the course of treatment, if necessary. Make all boring, but the necessary home affairs, which before the hands did not reach.

Do not close

Unfortunately, often in a period of forced inaction, a person is spoiled with loved ones. At first, he sympathize with him, but as it closes, goes depressed, it begins to annoy others.

● Try not to turn off the life of the family: take on any duties that previously performed by others, share your thoughts, discuss home problems.

● If you are invited to visit friends, do not refuse, referring to a bad mood. Maybe just there you will meet the one who helps you find a job. Despite the progress in the field of employment (Internet, recruiting agencies), we prefer to take to work, as before, "by acquaintance."

● Do not neglect the proposal of temporary work, continuing to look for permanent. If you prove yourself well, it can become constant.

● No one is insured against dramatic turns of fate. Even genius. The example of one of the players of the Madrid Football Club "Real" is widely known. The remapion of the car accident for a whole year chained it to a wheelchair. In the end, he managed to stand up on his feet, but with a brilliant football career I had to say goodbye. "What to do? After all, except for football, I don't know anything! " - a former football player tormented. Friends advised him to try himself in ... a singing genre. And they did not lose. So the world was brilliant Julio Iglesias.

● No less significant story of another famous person. Before being glorified on the literary Niva, he was ... an accountant. Everything has changed when no one who does not famous Mr. Porter was accused of an embezzle and landed. From longing and hopelessness, he began to write stories. From prison, he went out by a popular footlist known under the pseudonym about Henry.

7 loyal ways To lose a job

1. Do not have plans.

2. Do not maintain at the proper level and not update your skills and skills.

3. Do not provide any results.

5. Surround yourself with squeezes.

6. Forget to pay tribute to others.

By the way

Stress caused by dismissal is stronger in men. Women are more resistant to fate and flexibly respond flexibly to the stressful situation. Very painfully experienced loss of work People of retirement age, as well as those who crosses the "dangerous" age frontiers: the so-called age of the first adult (33-35 / 35-37 years) and mature age - 46-48 / 52-54.

The level of experienced stress depends on the psychological type to which a person belongs. Temperamental, sociable people, although perceive the news of the dismissal is hard, overcome the stressful situation relatively quickly. As a rule, it is enough for two weeks to get rid of stress. Another thing is phlegmatic people, closed. Stress develops with increasing and stretching for a long period.

Guys, we put the soul in the site. So
what you open this beauty. Thanks for inspiration and goosebumps.
Join us in Facebook. and In contact with

If the majority of stress with which we are confronted in the office can be planned and prevented, then colleagues are uncontrolled variable. This is especially true of such an office problem as conflicts on the basis of personal qualities and values. Several simple tips will help survive in the atmosphere.

• Do not let a person systematically degrading you, "to brake a coalition": Communicate with other employees, as if nothing had happened.
• Some individuals hurt very much. If you can not reduce the intensity of your reaction, then at least limit contacts with the offender.
• Focus on strengths Opponent, remind myself about his contribution to the common cause. It will remove annoyance.

3. Provocations of conflict personalities

According to the study provided at the annual meeting of the American Psychiatric Association, 5-10% of workers may suffer from personality disorder. There are 4 major types.

The most fanatical and unpleasant of these types is conventionally called the "star".Such people fantasize about limitless success, believe that they all know the best of all, love to command and do not tolerate objections. Communicating with them, the composure should be kept and respecting their opinion, but still stand on your own, otherwise you will cease to reckon.

If you need to convince such a person in anything, try to speak the most reasonably as possible, tell us about the benefits that this separate colleague can get and the whole team.

4. Women's team

The office in which the overwhelming number of female employees is a typical conflict coherent environment. At first glance it may seem that the best way out is to keep a mansion. However, this, on the contrary, will configure colleague against you, and in the end it may even lead to dismissal. Therefore, choose the golden middle. How to do it ?

• Do not share with anyone with any information about your personal life and do not talk about problems that do not belong to solving work tasks.
• With you, gossip and rumors do you or just discuss someone behind your back? Show that you are not going to take part in such conversations. Just try to do without unnecessary morality.
• Observe the dress code and do not wear too bright and causing outfits, expensive wardrobe items, accessories.
• Do not strive to become "your own board." It is always noticeable and causes only contempt.
• Be careful, listen more and in turn Do not allow sharp statements to other colleagues.
• Do not neglect the rules and values \u200b\u200bof the company. If the organization is made by corporate standards and celebrate birthdays in the office, you should not ignore them.

5. Slipness colleague

The procedure contributes to the inner tranquility and the productivity of most people - but not all. Why do colleagues on the table Eternal Bardak? There may be several reasons for any.

• Some people inspire mess, they believe that it stimulates their ideas, pushes them to development.
• Someone simply does not notice the mess - he does not affect them in any way, they just see him. "

Before you collapse with accusations in the colleague, remind myself that there is no correct or wrong path, and what one like, may not like another. In the end, this is his workplace, and only he can decide what it will be.

If the papers of the colleague smoothly "crowdes" to your table, it will be enough for the usual calm request not to break the borders.

6. Gap friendly relations with colleague

Friendship in the workplace has its pros and cons. One of the minuses is a sense of awkwardness that arises when close relationships are crumbling, and you have to see this person every day at work.To overcome it:

• Abstract from disagreements in the personal sphere and focus on how your former comrade is good in fulfilling their official duties.
• Focus on performing your service tasks.
• Try to maintain a normal professional relationship with a person with whom you have once friendly.

7. Consequences of an office party

Joint holidays are one of the Timbilding techniques. Studies have shown: managers believe that joint holidays and trips to nature, games and participation in public events strengthen relations in the team, which leads to more efficient work, as if integrating personal and professional life into a single whole.

But here there is a reverse side - the unwanted consequences of corporate events. Usually it is expressed in the stupid behavior of colleagues. But you yourself can get into an awkward situation.

The best option is to control your behavior. Well, if something happened at first glance, the irreparable, do not be angry. If possible, try to translate everything into a joke. If necessary, explain to those who were offended by the lacarock.

8. Passive aggression

Try to bring such a colleague on an open conversation to find out the reasons for such behavior. As a rule, it is misunderstanding, a shortage, hidden discontent, which a person because of character or other circumstances does not want to express clearly.

If you yourself are experiencing a hidden aggression in relation to a colleague, try to see in it the good side. Do not hide angrily or offense.

9. Blurred behavioral borders

Regardless of what others do or say, everyone is in the end responsible for themselves, so it is better to adhere to a moderately official communication format.

At work should not speak and do everything that I want, and at the same time do not need to allow other people to establish moral and ethical borders for you. The fact that for one is normal for another can be completely unacceptable.

Effective tool to combat familiarity at work - give colleagues direct and instantaneous feedbackBut without transition to personality. That is, not humiliating and not attacking, politely report what you want, but why not. The wording may be like this: "Can I ask you not to do this regarding me / not to say this in my presence?"

Did you happen conflict situations at work? How did you solve them? Tell us about your experience in the comments.

In this article we will talk about how to survive dismissal from work. With this problem, almost every person came across at least once in his life. And it's not always easy to cope with this, especially if the work liked and you have invested a lot of strength. Completion of the retirement age can complicate. So what to do and how not to afford to surrender?

Causes of dismissal from work

We list those professionals who can get into the risk area:

• Employees who have been achieved that do not improve their qualifications do not improve skills.
• The results of the employee's activities are not seen by anyone.
• People believing that they do not depend on anyone.
• Employees surrounding themselves with whims and ignoring constructive criticism.
• People who are badly launched with colleagues.
• Those who refuse to mention their career achievements.

Consequences of dismissal

What can be expected if you were fired from work? The first thing you will experience is shocking and stress. The usual world around a person collapses, familiar remains in the past, self-esteem drops sharply. Often a large number of layoffs occur in crisis situations, in the period when the bosses seeks to leave only the most valuable and promising workers. And this leads to the fact that the person who fell into such a situation is beginning to climb the thoughts that he is worse than everyone, is unable to achieve anything in life, etc.

It is impossible to dwell on it, you need to distract from the gloomy dum. Think about the fact that everything is relatively, because someone is better in one, someone in the other. Do not forget that this failure can be the beginning of something new.

And now we will analyze two wonderful ways in more detail with depression and proceed to search for new work.

First method

How to survive stress when dismissing? Psychologists have long been proven that the emotional state of a dismissed person is comparable to those feelings that people are worried after treason or divorce. Therefore, the consequences, especially for those who have a weak psyche, can be the most severe, starting with depression and insomnitz, ending with nervous disruptions. To survive dismissal and keep health, you need to follow the advice that we will submit below.

Where to begin? Step one

How to survive dismissal from work? First you need to undergo the main stages of stress, which are four:

• The phase of denial. Shock state when it is very difficult to realize what is happening around.
• Phase anger. The first emotion appears - aggression. A person is constantly in a state of irritation, angry at loved ones and relatives, his own, fate, life.
• Phase bargaining. Attempt to return back to work by making something significant. For example, bring a new client or prepare a report.
• Phase depression. A person realizes that all attempts come back in vain.

Step two

We continue to describe the algorithm how to survive dismissal from work. So, we stopped at the depression stage. It is impossible to drive your negative emotions inside yourself, you need to learn them off out. To do this, you need to pick up a suitable way. It is not bad for such a goal gym. Celebrate with a boxing pear, presenting the head or unfriendly in her place, arrange the Marathon race, splashing aggression in motion.

In no case do not follow from loved ones. Tell us about experienced friends. After they speak, it will be much easier. Gradually, the circumstances of the dismissal will begin to remember everything less and less clearly, and emotions are divert.

Step Third

Remember, if they fired from work - this is not the end of the world, because life continues. However, negative stress stages can be delayed for several weeks. Do not let them stay with you for a long time. You can use a special psychological technique, which is called the "Alarm clock". Mentally need to "start" internal hours on a day. When the "Alarm clock is silent", start actively acting.

If you managed to survive the phase of negative emotions, then get ready for the adoption stage. During this period, you can analyze your behavior and understand what dismissal was caused. This will make it possible to comprehend what is happening and will help begin to act further.

It is necessary to make a list of those positive moments that allowed dismissal into your life. For example, you got rid of the pick-up of the head or podkoms of colleagues.

Step fourth

You were fired from work. What to do? Abstract from emotions and analyze recorded reasons for dismissal on points. Do not take seriously aspects such as a crisis, staff reduction, harmful chief, etc. Be honest with you, and perhaps you will understand that you have long ever need to throw this job.

Then think about what profession is closer to you and what would really want to do. On the paper sheet, write down those knowledge and skills that are required for the selected work. Mark the skills that you do not own, and start filling the gaps in education.

Pitch fifth

There are many ways to survive dismissal. The advice of the psychologist is convinced in one - as soon as stress passed and it became clear what I want to continue, you need to start looking for a new work. And here it is impossible to limit ourselves to one way. It is necessary to use all possible - ads, Internet sites, acquaintances, employment service, etc.

Try during your search to save that routine of the day, which was to dismiss - awake, breakfast and dinner, do business at the same time. This will help keep yourself in a tone and do not relax. To your search for a new service place, treat as an exam.

Second way: Do not forget about the formalities

Consider another option of how to survive dismissal from work. The emergence of depression is possible anyway. However, you can switch your attention to the formal side of the case.

After the first emotional shock, the thoughts will begin to appear that dismissal will spoil your labor book and put a cross on a career. You need to immediately drive these ideas. Do not try on the role of a friend and do not shiver before the director. There is nothing more to lose you anyway, so try to figure out. Be sure to find out the reason for dismissal. Do not forget about your rights and labor legislation. You cannot be put up for the threshold without livelihood. Do not let the employer progress on it.

Be sure to control your emotions. Do not allow pity to take the top, try to keep calm. During conversations with the leadership, do not threaten and do not go to the person. The discussion must be kept strictly by business. In advance, study the TC (dismissal and everything that is connected with it, especially) and pick up the paragraphs of the law to which you will refer. We are worthy. Bad relationships with a former employer may complicate the search for a new place, since the bosses may refuse to give recommendations.

Do not relate to the failure of your entire life. Try to perceive it as an opportunity to start all over again. In addition, in the old place you have acquired certain skills and experience that will be useful in the future life.

Dismissal pensioner

How to survive the dismissal of a pensioner? After all, people of this age are more vulnerable in such a situation. Often, pensioners give a lot of strength and drag on with all his heart. For them, work has long become an integral and very important part of life. Therefore, it is much more complicated to cope with depression.

Have you been fired after you retire you? What to do? Usually, pensioners remain a lot of friends. Do not forget about them and correct. Support for loved ones can help. Remember that the pension is an excellent opportunity to live in your own pleasure. You have a lot of time that you can spend on yourself and your hobbies - more often walk, find a hobby.

Tips of the psychologist for pensioners and people of prenets

It is terrible to lose the place where it remains very little to retirement. The reasons for dismissal from work can be different, but you need to ensure that they are legal.

By this time, a person accumulates great experience, brings his skills to perfection and perfectly understands its sphere, but employers prefer to hire young people. Especially hard in this situation for women.

At older, they no longer think about what field you want to work, since it has long been decided and change something late. It is necessary to analyze your skills and knowledge, and then define the branch where they can be most in demand. You can find a suitable vacancy with neighbors familiar and even former colleagues. The latter are especially valuable in this regard, as they continue to rotate in the necessary professional circles.

You need to pay attention to your appearance. At the interview, you should hold a friendly and confident in yourself. At the same time you need to be ready for failure. You can hear "no" you can many times, so you do not need to despair and fall into Handra. Try not to lose the combat mood and do not forget about the power of belief.

Today, the main requirement for a potential employee is the ability to work on a computer. Therefore, you will have to master this skill if you are applying for a good position.

TK: Dismissal. The legislative framework

Any dismissal should be based on 80 articles of the Labor Code of the Russian Federation. Be sure to familiarize yourself with this law and read all the amendments that have been made to it.

If the case is complicated, it will be useful to refer to the lawyer. You must make sure that everything happens according to the law and the boss does not try to deceive you without paying the compensation. In the stressful situation, people rarely think about the legal side of the case, since they are in the denial phase or anger. And when emotions are dulled, then demand something too late. If you yourself can not deal with legislative subtleties, refer to your loved ones.

Instruction

Allow yourself to go through all four negative stress stages. In the denial phase, a person is in shock and practically does not realize what is happening. In the period of anger, he wakes up emotions and aggression: the person who had lost work begins to be angry with his employers, and on himself, and to life. The next stage is a bid stage: "If I can attract a new partner, the chef will call me back." The last negative stage is depression, which attacks a person when he understands that his efforts to return to work are vain.

Negative emotions can not be driven inside and try to restrain. If anger is torn out, find a way to throw it out. Put on boxing gloves and beat the pear, presenting that this is your former boss. Pour soul to friends and acquaintances - the more often you tell your story, the less emotions on this occasion you are experiencing. Over time, the circumstances of your dismissal will begin to seem insignificant and your attitude to this event will change.

Negative stress stages can last a few weeks, but do not let them stretch for months and years. Use the psychological reception "alarm clock". "Get your own internal alarm clock for a certain period, and after the expiration of the set time, take yourself in your hands and begin to act constructively.

After throwing all the negative emotions, you will reach the stage of acceptance. This stage will give you the opportunity to analyze your mistakes that led to the dismissal, and also will give you the strength to move on.

Make a list of positive moments of your dismissal. For example, now you do not have to endure the reprimand the head, work overtime, getting to work at the other end of the city. You are now important to learn to see new opportunities and prospects. Make your life motto expression: "No matter what is done - all for the better."

Analyze the reasons for your dismissal. Attention should not be paid to such factors as the reduction of states, the crisis, the stupid boss. Most likely, the inner desire to find new job I still had a place, admit to this. Think about what work you would like to have. Write down all the skills and knowledge that are required for the desired post. Then mark the items that you are missing and make them fill.

Start looking for a new job. Provide all possible types of search - employment service, acquaintances, ads in the media, sites on the Internet. During the employment, keep the mode of the work person's day - it will help you to keep yourself in the right form and not relax too much. Treat dismissal and search for work as a strength exam, successfully passing which you achieve success.